


What the Hell is a Heifer?

by Theyna_Shipper



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Craigslist, Cute, F/F, Farmer!Will, Light crack, M/M, Meet-Cute, Misunderstanding, Nico is annoyed but then he sees will, Texting, Wrong number, based on a tweet, under 1000 words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:49:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25004173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theyna_Shipper/pseuds/Theyna_Shipper
Summary: After someone accidentally puts his number on a Craiglist ad, Nico is swamped with texts about buying a heifer. He goes to speak with the poster about it, and finds him very understanding and friendly.ORA bizarre wrong number fic based on this post: https://me.me/i/somebody-on-craigslist-has-a-cow-for-sale-and-accidentally-17800548
Relationships: Nico di Angelo/Will Solace, Thalia Grace/Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano
Comments: 4
Kudos: 71





	What the Hell is a Heifer?

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! This is my first solangelo in a while but I saw this old tweet and it immediately seemed to have potential so here you go. I hope you enjoy!

Nico groans as he checks his phone in the morning. _More_ texts about buying something called a heifer. 

**Nico: wtf is a heifer**

**Unknown number: There is a Craigslist ad for a heifer with your phone number**

**Nico: i dont have a heifer**

The texts have been coming since last night, ever since some _idiot_ put Nico’s phone number instead of his own on an ad to sell a heifer. And Nico has no idea how to contact the culprit. 

He tumbles out of bed and fixes his perfect bedhead- he’ll comb it and add product later. Right now he needs coffee. 

“‘Morning,” calls Jason, his roommate. “How are you doing?”

“What in the hell is heifer?” Nico mumbles back. 

Jason purses his lips. “If I remember my James Herriot correctly- some kind of cow?”

“Hmph. Is that toast?”

He nods. “Want some?”

“That would be great.”

“Thalia is dropping by to pick up those posters soon, by the way,” Jason reminds him. Nico had volunteered to draw some posters for Thalia and Reyna’s daughter’s school. 

“I guess I’d better shower, then,” he sighs, putting down his coffee, and heads for the bathroom. 

When Nico emerges (his phone still exploding with texts), Thalia is perched on the breakfast table, in conversation with her brother. “So anyways, we’ve been trying to explain to Phoebe that she can’t get a cow-”

Nico snorts. “Why would she want a cow?”

She shrugs. “We took her to that farm outside of town over the weekend- farms are her latest obsession- and we were looking at this cow. And the farmer was saying he’d been trying to sell the cow but couldn’t find a buyer. Now Phoebe thinks _we_ should buy the cow. You know how kids are.”

“So _that’s_ the cow I keep getting texts about!” Nico blurts out. Thalia and Jason give him identical confused looks. “Sorry. I’ll explain later,” he mutters. “Farm outside of town, you said?”

“Yes, but-”

“Great. Tell Phoebe I said hello. Enjoy the posters. I’ll be back later.”

“Nico, you can’t just run off without expl-”

He most certainly can. It’s easiest, he’s found, to run off, deal with your business, and then explain later. 

Which is how he finds himself in front of “Apollo’s Farms” an hour later, his phone filled with confused texts from friends and demanding texts from mistaken customers. This farmer is going to get a piece of his mind for being so careless with his CraigsList ad. 

Nico bangs several times on the door before someone pulls it open unexpectedly. 

“Can I help you?” a chipper southern accent asks. 

“I-” Maybe Nico was expecting a more stereotypical farmer. Maybe he was expecting someone older. But he wasn’t expecting _this_ \- this beautiful blonde man who looks like some kind of Greek god. “About your Craigslist ad-”

“Did you want to see her? I’m willing to negotiate prices.”

Nico finds his voice again. _”No._ I’ve been getting day and night texts about that stupid heifer-”

“It’s pronounced ‘heffer’,” the farmer corrects. Nico had been saying it as ‘hi-fur’. 

“Heffer. Anyways, you _clearly_ put the wrong phone number on your ad. I keep getting texts from people. I don’t even know what a heifer _is_!”

“Well, my apologies,” he says cheerfully. “This must have been a misunderstanding. Care to come in? I’m sure we can get this all settled.”

Nico snaps out of his angry reverie to realize he’s being a bit ready. “Of course. I’m Nico, by the way.”

“Will Solace. Pleasure to meet you.” 

Nico shakes Will’s sturdy and strong hands, and stands nervously inside. 

Will goes to check an ancient desktop computer on his dining room table. “Yep, I put the wrong number on there. Changed the last digit. My bad, sorry for the trouble.”

Nico shrugs. “Everyone makes mistakes. I’m just glad we got it sorted out.” 

“Stay for lunch, won’t you? You did drive all the way out here.”

“I really shouldn’t,” Nico sighs. He promised he would drop by the fair at Phoebe’s school. Then he has an idea. “But maybe you can give your number? So I can forward it to the people who’ve been texting me?” 

“‘Course,” Will says, handing over a sheet of paper with the number written on it. “Thanks for going to the trouble.”

“It’s not a problem. Good luck selling the cow.”

Will walks him out to his car, and Nico explains the mistake to the many confused heifer-buyers. Then he looks down at the number- only one digit different from his own, it’s serendipitous, really- and sends one last text. 

**Nico: this wasn’t just a ploy to get your number, but now that i have it…**

**Will: You can’t have a discount on the heifer ;)**

**Nico: i was thinking coffee instead**

**Will: That does sound better :)**

**Nico: saturday at 2?**

**Will: See you then.**

**Author's Note:**

> Comments greatly appreciated <3


End file.
